Why Do Happy People Have Affairs?


In the first installment of our four-part series on infidelity, relationship and sex expert Esther Perel looked at how we define infidelity, and how our definition of cheating has evolved over the years.

Next up, Perel takes on a thornier issue: why people in happy relationships still sometimes wind up cheating. Instead of indicating that there’s some hole to be filled in the relationship—or in ourselves—affairs often mean that we’re looking for a different version of ourselves, says Perel, rather than just a different partner. Cheating can often be a means of self-exploration, albeit one that’s very hurtful to our loved ones.

“I think what is important to understand is that it’s not always a problem in the relationship, or a problem in you,” says Perel. Check out the clip above for the full explanation, and stay tuned later this week for more videos from Perel, including tips on how couples can heal in the aftermath of an affair.

Video credits:

Narrated by: Esther Perel

Illustrated by: Natalia Ramos

Animated by: Daniel García



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